Why The Happy Can't Understand the Depressed | Volume 6

Using this space this week to encourage everyone to watch the film "Stutz" on Netflix. If you somewhat enjoy this newsletter, I have a good feeling you'll like it. It's that good.

Moving right along...

Here's what I've been thinking about lately:*

*In addition to "what in the world is wrong with IU basketball?"

Haven't subscribed? New here? This newsletter, Makes Ya Think, poses questions about human behavior, and hopefully, provides insights that challenge your beliefs, offer a unique perspective and if nothing else...make you think.

Why can't the happy understand why the depressed can't just "snap out of it"?

You've heard this before: don't judge someone until you've walked a mile in their shoes.

Just like the cliche "practice makes perfect", the reason you hear this is that, well, it's true.

It's also advice that tends to be ignored - by the wealthy who judge the poor as lazy, the happy who can't understand why the depressed can't just "snap out of it" and...by Kevin, who doesn't get what can be so difficult about throwing out a first pitch (looking at you Fauci and 50 Cent).

***

There's been no shortage of first-pitch blunders.

I mean, how hard can it be? Have these people ever thrown a baseball before?

Well, after having experienced it first-hand a few years ago (in a minor league stadium, nonetheless), it's not as easy as it looks.

From afar, you don't feel the weight of the thousands of eyes watching you or the loneliness of the mound. You didn't pause to think about how you look on the jumbotron (and if anyone you know is in the stands watching).

Ok ok, I'll get to the point: I threw it about two feet off the plate. Like so far right, it would've gone behind the batter and the benches would've cleared.

Yikes.

Fauci? Maybe that dude's never thrown a baseball in his life. But, I'd be willing to bet the pressure got to him a bit.

For the same reason the happy can't understand the depressed, I couldn't understand the difficulty of a first pitch because....I hadn't experienced it.

Have you ever experienced something painful for the first time - anything from a major injury to a breakup - and thought, "wow...now I truly understand what (insert name here) was going through"?

That's exactly what we're talking about.

It turns out, to truly understand another person's perspective, you don't just try harder to imagine it. You actually have to actually be in that perspective - you have to experience it.

This is widely-applicable wisdom. Let's look at a few examples.

***

Former Chicago radio personality Erich "Mancow" Muller didn't consider waterboarding to be torture.

He's not alone. To some, the thought of lying on your back and having water poured over your nose doesn't seem all that bad.

But then he experienced it.

"It was way worse than I thought it'd be and that's no joke," he said. "It was...and I don't want to say this: torture."

No amount of imagining will allow you to understand what it's like to be in that situation. You have to actually experience it.

Oh, and by the way, the average person can last about 14 seconds.

Muller lasted seven.

Does this explain why my "tough guy" friend always says he wants to fight, but then chickens out when people challenge him?

Great question. Yes, I certainly think it could.

"If that dude would've said something, I would've beat his ass." 

We all have a friend, or at the very least, know someone like this.

This is Mr. Tough Guy. The same Mr. Tough Guy that runs away or makes excuses once "that dude" actually does say something and agrees to fight.

Truth is, you don't really know how you'll react in a certain situation until it's staring you right in the face - fists closed and ready to brawl.

Similarly, when gun violence occurs, people tend to imagine that if only they were there, they would have stayed calm, drawn their weapon and shot down the shooter.

Would they have? I'm not going to say no.

But...what I will say is this: it's one thing to imagine what you'd do from your living room couch and another to personally experience the life-or-death situation as it unfolds.

Quote I'm Thinking About

Wow. I've never even considered looking at it this way. A beautiful quote from Irvin's new book, "A Matter of Death and Life".

Tweet I'm Thinking About

Spot the lie. Truer words have never been spoken.

Parting Thoughts

One of my favorite artists, Quinn XCII, is dropping the song of the summer this Friday. Check it out.

G2G bye! (signing off like nothnbutnet23, my AIM screen name)

Kevin